Swiss Cheese

You may have heard it called CRS amongst the over 40 female crowd, Can’t Remember S***.  Women who suffer from this syndrome usually (I am stereotyping here, forgive me) have multiple children, work more than 30 hours week and the children each have at least 1 extracurricular activity. We simply can’t remember everything family or society expects us to remember.

I have been using a different excuse for my lack of memory  for the past 4 years.  Chemo brain: It is a scientifically proven "non-fact".  (For more on this you can look it up on the American Cancer website)  My oldest daughter rolls her eyes and ask me “How long are you going to use that chemo excuse?” when I say I can’t remember something.  It appears she doesn’t appreciate the chemo card any more, and can’t possibly understand it.  Maybe she will understand this.  Swiss Cheese.

Yes, Swiss Cheese. I think my brain has turned into a big round of Swiss cheese, tunnels of holes intertwined with really great solid parts. Problem is you have to navigate through the emptiness to get to the great parts. 

 Swiss Cheese: The next time I go to the grocery store with the list that I spent 10 minutes digging for through my compartmentalized handbag (sure! That was supposed to help) I can blame it on Swiss Cheese. 

Swiss Cheese that caused me to write an unintelligible  word on that list, which I will only realize when I finally remember what in the world I am cooking for dinner. (special note: I rarely cook:  I can never remember what I am doing ahead of time to plan correctly)

Swiss Cheese is to blame when I carry an empty bag upstairs to my child’s room, knock on the door and stare blankly at them, grimace and walk back down the steps.  They won that round.  I don’t have enough fingers and toes to count the number of times I walk into a room and forget why I am there.  I never remember.  What was I saying?

My 15 year old says my theory is completely flawed.  In his highly educated way he informed me that the holes in Swiss cheese are caused by the bacteria introduced into the milk whey during the process.   My problem he informed me, is over-load and too much hair dye, not bacteria.  “ You could get that fixed with a drug Mom”  He laughed.  

As many of the over-loaded population have done, I have turned to assistant  devices.  Mine are far less technology driven than most: The planner/calendar with pockets, the notebook gadget on my cell phone and calendar with alerts 

.  One would think that with these 3 helpers I could remember the simple daily routine.  Not so, Swiss cheese wins more often than I care to admit.

For now I will continue to struggle, listen to the advice of fellow Swiss cheese sufferers for  helpful hints and pick up a box of crackers the next time I am grocery shopping. 5 grain goes really well with Swiss cheese.