Blah Blah Hum Bug

Blah Hum Bug

Sitting here looking at Christmas in 4 boxes, a huge sigh of relief escaped my body. It’s finally over.  I survived: One of the toughest Christmas’ on record is over.  I have packed it away. The holiday season has not been a merry one.  The absence of one of my children caused me great distress the entire season.

I had those visions inspired by commercials of my wayward child miraculously coming home. You know the one where the son arrives home unexpectedly on a snowy morning to be greeted by his little sister; this little sister had no such greeting.  No such coffee was poured, no song sung, there was no snow.

 I was more joyful today taking down the decoration than I was at Thanksgiving putting them up. I rejoiced that I would not have these painful reminders jingling in my face.  Santa would not be hanging on every kitchen door knob, no snowman on every hand towel.   I can hear Dickens' Scrooge grumbling in my head. My foul mood would’ve surpassed his on any given day this season. I’ve literally dared those ghosts to visit me. I’d have chased them back to their starry graves, robes flapping in horror had they visited.

When I thought about this blog I realized I was not the only one in my world that had a not so merry season.  I have loved ones who endured more. They have suffered the loss of a loved one, the loss of good health, experienced the end of a marriage, a relationship, a job.

The holidays are meant to be joyful. For many of us, it was a time of great stress.   We were forced to respond to those Holiday greetings, forced to respond to questions about how we are doing. Personally I tried to respond happily, I couldn’t fool everyone.

I’ve tried to pack my foul mood away with all the tree trimmings, Santa Clauses and brightly colored stockings.  One stocking remains hanging. It will remain hanging for as long as it takes.

May 2012 be a year of new beginnings, healing and hopefulness.

As long as it takes.